Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Bossy & Selfish Remember

Once again Bossy worried out loud to Selfish that she'd inadvertently offended someone. Selfish rolled his eyes and advised Bossy not to worry.

Like those words ever work.

Bossy leaped up from their cozy and went to the computer to look up on Google "define: peanut gallery".

"Oh Dear!" Bossy said with Selfish leaning over her shoulder. "It really isn't a very nice thing to say."

Selfish groaned.

"I meant it funny!" Bossy squealed. "I can't believe this is happening! I'm sick of people getting offended over the smallest things and not discussing it with you!"

Selfish patted her on the back and gently took her arm and led her back to the bed. Lying there together, curled into each other Selfish said: "You don't even know they've taken offense yet. You're panicking over nothing."

Once again Bossy reiterated: "I'm sick of this! I'm just sick of this! I'm sick they'd misunderstand. I'm sick that apparently I have to be outrageously careful about what I say. I'm sick I may have offended them." She paused for a bit. "I was being funny!" she whined. "Oh Selfish, you know I didn't mean to offend them?"

Selfish squeezed a bit harder and said calming things like "tut tut" and "I love you".

"I've got one of my weird headaches!" Bossy complained further. "I'm sick of this!"

"Tut tut."

After a while, Bossy calmed down and then she and Selfish went through a litany of times in their past lives when they'd crossed paths with people who didn't see things the same way they did.

  • "Remember the lady at the marina who wouldn't let us through the gate onto the dock to go back to our boat because she didn't know us?"

  • "Remember the woman & her daughter that screamed at us that the woman was 'old' so they were justified in taking the parking spot we'd been waiting for?"

  • "Remember the 'lady' in the grocery store who got all offended because we wanted to go past her cart which was taking up all the room in the aisle?"

  • "Remember the man in the parking lot who threatened us with the base ball bat because he was mad at us for waiting for the traffic to clear?"

    Oh Dear (!) & Etc.

    After a while, Bossy calmed down and then both Bossy & Selfish agreed that they should take life as it came at them and try to laugh at most of it.

    "Not Japan though..." Bossy cautioned. "I knew some bigoted idiot would say that the earthquake & tsunami happened to them because God didn't love them!"

    Selfish laughed.

    Bossy went on..."And then did you notice that there wasn't a word about God not liking the Southern States!"

    Selfish shook his finger at Bossy and she gave up and cozied in, trying to clear her mind and just be.




    PS:- As it turned out, Bossy was only being overly sensitive and didn't offend anyone....that day.