Thursday, 30 January 2014

My Reality Cheque Just Bounced

My Reality Cheque Just Bounced #bumperstickers

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors. #factoid

As soon as people decide to confront a problem, they realize that they are far more capable than they thought they were. ~ The Zahir #quote

PHILISTINE, n. One whose mind is the creature of its environment, following the fashion in thought, feeling and sentiment. He is sometimes learned, frequently prosperous, commonly clean and always solemn. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary #quote

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left #palindromes #factoid

You can employ men and hire hands to work for you, but you must win their hearts to have them work with you. ~ Tiorio #quote

Add Fuel To The Fire: Whenever something is done to make a bad situation even worse than it is. #ENGidiom

The chief weapon of sea pirates, however, was their capacity to astonish. Nobody else could believe, until it was too late, how heartless and greedy they were. ~ Kurt Vonnegut #quote

SELF-EVIDENT, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary #quote

Our toaster works on either AC or DC, but not on bread. It has two settings: too soon or too late. ~ Sam Levenson #quote

In the seventeenth-century a Boston man was sentenced to two hours in the stocks for obscene behaviour, his crime, kissing his wife in a public place on a Sunday. #factoid

Southpaw: Someone who is left-handed. #ENGidiom

Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has courage to lose sight of the shore. #oneliners

One good thing about forgetting is that you can no longer worry about what ever it was you forgot. #oneliners

EAVESDROP, v.i. Secretly to overhear a catalogue of the crimes and vices of another or yourself. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary #quote

War is a cowardly escape from the problems of peace. ~ Thomas Mann #quote
I believe we are still so innocent. The species are still so innocent that a person who is apt to be murdered believes that the murderer, just before he puts the final wrench on his throat, will have enough compassion to give him one sweet cup of water. ~ Maya Angelou #quote

Never miss a good chance to shut up. #sarcasticsayings

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. ~ George Bernard Shaw #sarcastic #quote

Sign at a crematorium: Urn more. Pay less. #JustaJoke

Cup Of Joe: A cup of coffee. #ENGidiom

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you. ~ Maya Angelou #quote

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure. #paraprosdokian #ENGgrammar

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. ~ #OneLiner

Queen Mary having bottom scraped #FunnyNewspaperHeadlines

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth. ~ Umberto Eco #quote

Pure Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbours decide who gets the milk. #EssenceofPoliticalScience

REDEMPTION, n. Deliverance of sinners from the penalty of their sin, through their murder of the deity against whom they sinned. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary #quote

If you spend word for word with me, I shall make your wit bankrupt. ~ from Two Gentlemen of Verona. #ShakespeareInsults
Long in the Tooth: Old people (or horses) #ENGidiom

Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away. ~ Antoine de Saint Exupery

I'm happy to report that my inner child is still ageless. ~ James Broughton #quotes

An average person laughs about 15 times a day. #factoid

She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs, and more wealth than faults. ~ From Two Gentlemen of Verona #ShakespeareInsults

Rome Was Not Built In One Day: If you want something to be completely properly, then its going to take time. #ENGidiom

Pure Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. #EssenceofPoliticalScience

Redolent: aromatic, evocative #ExquisiteAdjectives

You have delighted us long enough. ~ Jane Austen #sarcastic #quote

Why are zero scores in tennis called 'love'? ~ In France , where tennis became popular, round zero on the scoreboard looked like an egg and was called 'l'oeuf,' which is French for 'egg.' When tennis was introduced in the US Americans mis-pronounced it 'love.' #factoid

More doors are opened with "please" than with keys. #oneliners

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded. ~ Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary #quote

When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier. ~ Roy E. Disney #quotes

The correct response to the Irish greeting, "Top of the morning to you," is "and the rest of the day to yourself." #factoid